Tuesday, 23 October 2012

30 Days of Submission - Day 26

What are the qualities you seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal-breakers as in “must” haves or “must not” have?

i think that probably i was looking for someone a bit different from the man with whom i live. There are certain aspects of the life i have here that i wouldn't wish to replicate. Plus truth be known, i was a woman of a certain age looking for fun. In my opinion i have been pretty successful. i wanted my dominant to be well dominant. i wanted him to tell, not ask and essentially that is what i get. i wanted him to help me to push the boundaries and that is what i got. 

The interesting thing though is that i didn't set out for an actual relationship, i was just looking for some fun online. But once we had chatted online and we moved onto the phone calls and once during those phone calls i did the things he instructed and loved it, i wanted more. Much more.

i wanted more sex, i wanted to try sex in ways i had never tried before, i wanted to submit. i wanted to dress for him, to parade myself for him, i wanted the humiliation and the excitement. i didn't know i wanted to be restrained, to be spanked, clamped. But i do.

What i also got was a fun, intelligent man. Someone to have a serious conversation with, to watch a film with, to discuss books with, even to visit a museum with! I also got a man who cooks a mean steak and who can be relied on to finish off the pudding i can't and shouldn't eat. 

i have learned not to prejudge what you want, but to expect the unexpected and to enjoy the moment. Hoping for some of those moments soon!

And on a lighter note........


  1. Like you I was not looking for a relationship what would lead me to places that I had only dreamed of...luckily we both found much more than we were looking for...LOL at the pic..that is me some days also!
    hugs abby

    1. thanks abby, you are so right about that! The pic is me too!

  2. I Iove what you say about not prejudging what you want and don't. I tell others regularly - how do you know you don't like it if you've never had it? (now this usually relates to food - but still!).
    Great picture =)

    1. Likewise with food :)

      I am getting better at not prejudging, maybe it comes with age or experience who knows!