Kinks and fetishes

Master has given me the task of blogging about my kinks and fetishes. I have written about all of them in this blog in the past, but this will give me the opportunity to go into much more detail.

There is no doubt that life in the kinky world has moved quickly for me, since my first encounters in April 2012. I was lucky to meet a man who made his fetishes clear to me and then who pushed my boundaries to achieve them. I have to admit the first time he called me a slut, or a whore, I wasn't sure  I exactly liked it. But what was clear was that being called those names turned me on. So in no particular order:

Humiliation and exhibitionism - I am putting these together, because even though it is not always the case so often they have taken place at the same time. Wearing clothes I wouldn't usually wear, perhaps without underwear can be both liberating and at the same time humiliating. Being out with Master while wearing  a short and revealing dress turns me on. I love the idea that others might look at me and think me a slut, I am willing to expose myself for Him, and to stand in a way that He can touch me up in a public place. I find it exciting, thrilling and shameful all at the same time. Sometimes though, I have been meeting Him somewhere and for example might have been to buy shoes. I am aware of my body at all times, the fear that i might need to bend over, might trip and my body be seen is scary but exciting. I love to be told how dirty I am, I love also to be made to express myself in words I wouldn't usually wish to. To use the words whore, slut, cunt in ways that I know turn Him on and in doing so do the same to me. To have those words written on my body and to see them in the mirror as I dress in the morning is also a big turn on. I am not sorry that Master doesn't have the same fetish for heels and stockings as S did. While I like the feel of the stockings, they are often too short, as I am tall. Of course, I would never have objected if that had been what He had wanted from me.

Being touched, played with, or even having sex out doors, especially in a public place is a big turn on for me. I love the feel of the air on my skin and the risks associated with being discovered doing something that is essentially taboo.

Anal play - I have written here quite a bit about the thrill Anal sex gives me. It feels on the one hand the most intimate thing, the biggest turn on and on the other something shameful (back to the humiliation thing). Increasingly I can orgasm without stimulation elsewhere, while having anal sex. What is more, the very presence of a butt plug, can be calming and settling. It helps put me into the most amazing head space. I have my new, larger plug at home and am very much looking forward to getting to know it much more intimately.

Restraint - I love to be restrained, especially when I have had a lot going on in my life, when I am tense. I love my legs to be restrained in the spreader bar, to have my arms tied (though I am less keen on handcuffs as they can be uncomfortable). If I am also blindfolded and gagged, then all the better. I love the way in which all of those things heighten your senses and make it hard to know what is exactly being done to you and with what toy.

Recently I have discovered that multiple orgasms, forced or otherwise, can have the effect of making me feel as though I am restrained, when I am not. This feeling helps my submission, especially when again I have been somewhat stressed for whatever reason.

Nipple play - My nipples have always been sensitive, but since I had them pierced you can multiply that 10 fold. I love when He plays with them in a public place or gives them a quick squeeze. I love them played with during sex, and I found out last week that it is possible to cum with no stimulation other than having your breast squeezed. I love also to play with  my own nipples and when alone, I do.

Pain - I am something of a pain slut, but not a masochist by any stretch of the imagination. Having said that, the more turned on I am, then the more pain I can tolerate. Especially if Master has taken a reasonably slow approach, perhaps starting with the violet wand and moving up through various paddles, crops and whips. Pain on my cunt, my tits and my legs are as good for me as on my bottom and back though.

Orgasm control, forced orgasms - The most amazing thing ever in my book is the hitachi, to be forced against your will (if indeed it was against my will) to cum multiple times with that wonderful toy is one of the best things. Closely followed by being able to cum just because someone tells you to. Luckily for me, Master likes me to cum and considers it an important thing, that orgasms are released and given to Him. Giving up that control was the first thing I did for Him and it is probably what got me to where I am now.

Cock worship - I am not sure this is a fetish or kink, since doesn't every woman do this? Maybe not, since I didn't in the past. The D/s dynamic gives a whole new perspective; He wants you to get down before Him and take Him, you want to, since you love His cock so much. Whatever, I do actually worship His very cock.

Have I missed anything? This might be a post that I need to add to......

Master's slut

This girl has been instructed to make a new mark on herself:

The small mound of hair is being grown specially for this girl's Master, at His request.

I am a slut

There is no getting away from it, this girl is a slut and what is more she likes to be one.

Yesterday this girl took a half day as Sir was in London, not so very far from where this girl works, on business. They met for a look around some (mainly closed due to it being Maundy Thursday) interesting churches. As usual though even a closed church is interesting with Sir around, plus there are always some hidden places in London that Sir knows and this girl hasn't yet laid eyes on. There was also a look around the National Gallery, which is always good for an hour or so - Sir imparts some of his art history knowledge, this girl admires or otherwise the paintings, commenting on the ugliness of some of those 18th century women.

This girl was dressed for work. She was wearing a black and cream dress, highly suitable for the business woman about town. She most definitely didn't look like a slut, but that is what she is. This girl had her bottom and tits felt in numerous places yesterday - churches, churchyards, gardens amongst the Royal Courts of Justice buildings, the National Gallery.... This girl was very turned on by the time they ate dinner. More so because in a pub before dinner, Sir instructed this girl to go remove her panties. Of course she did and then invited much more touching up while they finished up their drinks in that busy pub. This girl was in a fine submissive mood over dinner and did lots of smiling and looking into His eyes but less talking. This kind of behaviour pleases Sir (as previously stated).

This girl and Sir headed off to a final pub for a drink before getting their respective trains. The place was busy so they moved table a couple of times so that they could be positioned for this girl to be the slut she is and so he cold touch what is his. Sir and girl wanted much more from the evening, but since this girl has to go to a family lunch today they couldn't have it. There is something really exciting for this girl to be used and potentially humiliated in this way though. Something which will add to the anticipation for tonight.

Sir likes this girl to be His slut in this way and boy does being that slut turn this girl on!

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Overnight the stat counter turned over 50,000 hits. That seems a large number (though small in comparison to some) over 2 years. I am really grateful that people call by and read the stuff I write and also that people take the time to comment. Keep visiting and keep leaving your comments - I appreciate it. Thank you.

His slut

She wore a tight grey skirt, with a cream top. Heels.

Every bit the business woman?

Well a cream top with black bra?

Seamed stockings?

As they entered the bar, she looked around and saw people in casual dress. It was Sunday, so people were out for lunch, socialising, chatting.

He observed that men looked at her legs, observed the heels, skirt, blouse, bra. He loved it - his slut watched by other men in this way.

As they sat with their drinks, he told her to open her legs for him. Of course she complied.

She tried to chat normally, he smiled at the idea that they were observed in this way. Last time they had sat in this bar, she had felt conspicuous by her dress and demeanour. This time she ignored any embarrassment, proud to be HIS slut.

They finished their drinks, and headed for their room. Outside the door, he paused and ran his hand up her stockinged leg, inside her panties. she gasped as his fingers stroked her wet pussy, her clit. Taking his hand away, he undid the zip on his trousers, releasing his large, hard cock. She was on her knees before he told her to suck.

Gratefully she took him into her mouth. Closing her eyes, she tried to block out the sounds in the pub area below. Instead she concentrated on the feel of him, the taste and smell. She was pleased to have her mouth filled with him at last.

Then as she got to her feet, he used the key card to admit them to the privacy of their room.

He had loved that she had looked every bit his slut in the bar and that she had behaved like one outside the room. Now, she would be His slut in the room. They both knew what would happen next.......

Cock worshipping through skype

Even though i would love to, i am unable to see, feel, smell or taste Sir's cock every day. Even though it has been a couple of weeks since i last saw Him, i am fully able to visualise and to remember as i lie in bed of a morning or night. i love to imagine that i am touching His smooth shaft and that my hand is firmly placed around it as i widen my mouth in preparation to take him within. Sir has a large cock which is more than a mouthful, which means that when i do have It in my mouth, i am forced to give it my full attention. Sir of course loves me to worship Him in this way; why wouldn't he. He is my Master and i am His sub, His slut.

Recently we have used skype as a means of chatting and also as a way of being able to see each other's bodies as we do so. Sir loves to see my underwear, He loves to see me undress and to show him His possessions, the holes where he loves to put His cock. He loves to see me touch myself for Him, while i tell Him that i am a slut and a whore and tell him how much i love to feel His cock inside me.

In turn, i love to see Him stroke that lovely, big, fat cock. i love to imagine i am kneeling before him and that he is forcing it deep into my throat making my eyes water. i love to imagine running my tongue up and down its shaft, to be sucking him. i love to think of how it smells, to taste his precum as it emerges. As He strokes, He does so in a way that says - look at me, look at my lovely cock, look i love it as much as you do - and that makes me even more turned on and even closer to cumming for him.

While i look at Him through the means of this modern technology, i yearn to be there with him and i think ahead to the day when i will be. Skype isn't the same as being in the same room, but it certainly helps me in my worship of His cock.

The lovely Spanky has started a new Cock Worshipping Subs blog and i have become one of the authors there. i am going to cross post this post there.

Picture from Simply Black and White

Anal sex - a fulfilling taboo



If someone had told me a year ago that i would be having anal sex with anyone, much less enjoying the experience i would have told them that they were completely and utterly mad. Yet here i am full in the knowledge that i really am an anal slut.

It remains something i struggle with, since, even though no one actually ever told me that that was wrong, i still conformed to the belief that in some way it is dirty. Even though this was the case, i seemed to take little persuading that it was something i should try. Sir loves the idea that it is something that only He and i have done together, and that until He came along i had a virgin arse. In turn, i too love this thought and feeling.

It helps put me in my submissive place to feel like the slut, the whore that HE craves. It helps me find my submission and it helps me to feel that what i am doing is special.

The experience of the past 10 months or so has meant that i have learned to give myself to my internal anal slut and to find it easier and easier to be aroused and to orgasm during anal sex. We are told that there are fewer sensory receptors in the anus than in the vagina, but my experience is that if this is true, the body can be fooled and actually orgasm comes more easily this way. Perhaps it is psychological and it is the fact that it is something i shouldn't enjoy in the way i do. Maybe it relates to the fact that i yearn to do something different with Him, to please. Maybe it feeds my inner slut.

But there is no getting away from it. I really to love this part of TTWD!

Role play

i have always had something of a vivid imagination, so the fact that Sir does too and that He likes to play those fantasies out is a real turn on for me. On the first night we chatted, we role played a scene where i was an estate agent, coming to value his house and somehow we ended up going out for dinner. He loves the idea of a woman in a business suit, featuring a white blouse, wearing  black underwear, stockings, suspenders underneath. He loves high heels. That first time that was what i was wearing for dinner in our fantasy.

Since then, i have been a maid, a prostitute, a woman pulling a man at the airport and much more. Last weekend i was a religious woman who only knew of the missionary position for sex until she read 50 shades of grey. This had opened up a myriad of possibilities for her.

The black skirt and cream blouse would have suggested nothing if not combined with seamed stockings and shiny black heels. She knocked on the strangers door just as the bells rang for Sunday worship. She should have been there not here, but she had seen this man before and actually she wanted to know him better. He was a sole that she though could be saved. She had heard that he had a number of weaknesses that could be fixed. So here she was.

He invited her in. It was a cold morning and he was very friendly and definitely a humble soul who admitted he had sins which required forgiveness. Of course he wasn't fooled. One moment she was sitting timidly on a chair in his living room, the next she was on her knees sucking His cock and the very next, bending over being spanked. Perhaps the lack of knickers were the give away, but then how did he quite get his hand up her skirt without her running away? Rather than being a turn off, the feeling of his bare hand on her bottom was a massive turn on. She felt sure that any moment the juices erupting from her pussy would run down her leg. His wonderful fingers found her clit and brought her within moments of a beautiful orgasm. Just as she was going to ask him to carry on, she felt His very hard, very big cock inside her.

 "Oh my" she thought. "This is what i have longed for"
Instead she protested (rather weakly). He told her He thought that she was in fact a slut who was loving it. Of course that was exactly what she was.

Next He was pushing into that forbidden place. First with his fingers, which felt rather arousing, and then He was pushing that big cock into her. She tried to protest, but actually it just made her clit and her pussy throb all the more. Actually this was what she wanted. And He knew it. 

She had been found out. Rather than being the pious soul she had proported to be she was in fact a wanton slut who had knocked on a strangers door hoping for sex of the kinkiest kind. What is more she had got just what she needed.

As she left His house she noticed the church bells were silent. she hoped no one had noticed her absence this morning!

Worth the pain

This weekend was worth everything that has happened over the past few weeks and months. I mean that. The time since I came clean and told hubby has been far from plain sailing, but it felt better to be going off to see Sir without the need to lie. Of course I went (and returned) without knowing how things would be afterwards, I am pleased to say though that I probably worried too much.

So the weekend

I took a half day, so I could do some shopping in Sir's home town. The sales were still on and I am pleased to say I bought some lovely new, black, shiny shoes with a lovely slim heel and a new silky bra and suspender belt (no need for knickers) all at a reduced price.

At his place I showered and got ready before He arrived home. It had been 6 weeks since the last time,  much much too long and we were very eager to make up for some lost time. This time though we had the treat of two whole nights together.

I wore my underwear and shoes a fair bit, I wore the lovely nipple clamps, I was cuffed, collared and used. Oh boy was I used! I submitted and proudly worshipped my Master.

Sir was a bit unwell Saturday and I was pretty tired. The weather was awful so we stayed home and watched films and tv. He rallied late in the evening and I slipped back into stockings and heels and we retired to bed (no sleep yet though) so he could use my body again and again. He allowed me the most wonderful orgasms; so much so I can almost still feel them.

Sunday we engaged in a little role play which I will write about next time.  Then, after just a little more time together I was on my way home.

The return has been better than expected so maybe a corner has been turned. I am however missing Sir and have felt a bit down (sub drop perhaps?) I will get over it  plus wow what wonderful memories.

Yes it was worth all the pain. Plus of course I received some very welcome pain while I was there!

More about that too in a future post.

Joolz is definitely back!

Day Out - Part 2

i am a very lucky slut in that my Master tolerates my moodiness. So an hour after part 1, i was stripped to my basque, suspenders and heeled boots, lying on my back on a large (and might i say lovely) table. What do you call a large table which sits just a few inches high, like that, in the middle of the living room (coffee, occasional?) He was leaned over me, His cock in my mouth, His fingers caressing my pussy. Already i was putty in His hands, my previous irritations long gone. I took his cock in my mouth, i sucked and licked, i took him as deep as i could and then sucked and licked some more. i think, and things are a little hazy, i asked to cum and was granted that amazing experience. He is good like that. He attends to my needs and i know that in doing so, it turns Him on.

He made us tea (we had both had quite long journey's to meet) and then said we should repair upstairs (He is old fashioned like that). Sensibly, i drank most of my tea before we got that far.

He cuffed me, applied nipple clamps and had me crouch on the bed, legs wide. i was beyond wet. Still in my post orgasmic state i was ready for what was to come next. Not only did He spank me with his hand and the lead to my collar he also from somewhere produced a belt. Now that belt hurt, but pain and i are developing a new kind of relationship. It made me wetter than wet and as he said 'pliable'. Who doesn't want to be pliable for their Master?

i asked him about this last night. To begin with pain didn't feature. He wasn't keen on inflicting it and i wasn't keen on receiving it. But it turns out the two are linked. As i discovered that receiving pain turns me on, he finds that giving me pain turns him on. This is a really good thing and a self fulfilling prophesy!

His tongue licked me. i was almost wild with desire as it flicked around my clit. Then his tongue was replaced with his fingers, pinching me, giving me pain and pleasure at the same time. My clamped nipples tingled and burned, my pussy was beyond wet. His tongue moved to my ass hole, his fingers still on my clit.  i think around that time i asked for and was given another orgasm (as i say it is hazy).

Then at last he said "what is Master going to do now?"
"You are going to fuck my arse Sir"

There is something about anal sex which i cannot fully describe. He is the only man to have ever gone there. It is a kind of forbidden place and it feels just so special. He claims me. i submit. And so it was. He loves that He is the only person to have ever have fucked me there and the feeling is mutual.

This was a day out made in heaven!

Day Out - Part 1

The weather had turned pretty chilly, but she was well wrapped up against the cold wind in her new coat with its faux fur collar. She was also wearing a grey wool jumper, black jeans and boots. As she sat on the train for the first part of her journey, reading  a book on her kindle, she felt comfortable, warm but also a little apprehensive. She was very much looking forward to seeing Him, but at the same time she was anxious that she was meeting Him on a weekend day and that to do this she needed to create an untrue story for the person at home.

Her mood took a further dive as she locked herself in a cubicle in the ladies toilets at the large mainline station. It was too cold to take off her coat, so having removed her boots and jeans, she put on her stockings (attached to the basque she was already wearing under her jumper), put on a short skirt and high heeled boots. Observing herself in the mirror as she washed her hands, she noted that she looked good, but was pretty much the only person not to be wearing either trousers or opaque / woolly tights with their skirt. Most people were wearing flat shoes or boots rather than heels and to be honest she would have preferred that too. Putting those thoughts to one side she headed for the underground.

It was a short journey to the meeting place, just 3 stops on the tube and then they were together. Instead of being happy, pleased to see him, she was grumpy. He said he understood why she felt as she did, but that it would be worth it. She grudgingly admitted that this might be the case.

There was one more train journey to take to their destination. The carriage was almost empty, only 3 or 4 other passengers, perhaps 2 of them sitting reasonably close to them. He sat opposite her, and after a short time, instructed her to open her legs. She did as instructed and he ran his hand up her stocking leg and up to her pussy. He told her she was very wet. For some reason this irritated her. She didn't want to be wet when she was irritated in this way. He just smiled and worked her clit a little.

The first signs of a defrosting of her mood emerged and as he took his hand away and instructed her to touch herself, then as He stroked her some more, she began to actually look forward to what was to come (or cum).

Day Trip Part 2 - The Corset

Despite the fact i knew it fitted i tried the corset again on Tuesday, the day before my visit to Sir. This didn't seem to make it any easier for us to get me into it on Wednesday morning. BUT once we had fastened it, and Sir had tightened the laces it seemed very big at the top (maybe my whole weight loss is from my boobs i thought to myself as i lay on my back). This was despite the fact that i was at that time tied to each corner  His bed. But no. Even though i know this happened to Fondles, i wasn't alerted to the fact for some time that we had the thing on UPSIDE DOWN! I was looking for the suspender hooks that the internet site said it should have, when i found 2 around the boob area and another 2 under my armpits. Oh how Sir and I laughed at our mistake.

Once we had turned the thing around the right way and Sir had tightened it a couple of times i began to realise what a wonderful, sexy garment a corset can be. This led to me spending the entire day in just a corset, stockings and suspenders. i felt sexy, i felt ready at all times for Sir's cock and for anything he wanted from me. Once he sends them over, there will be a couple of pictures, which He took especially for me to put on my blog.

This morning, 3 days after the events of that day, i have to admit that my thoughts are a little confused. Not because i can't remember what happened or what effect it all had on my but probably because i can remember. It is hard to think what happened in what order, what senses were heightened and when.

Pain featured much more than it has to date. Spanked with his hand and then the lead which was attached to my collar. Spanked not only on my bottom, but also across my front, only served to make me amazingly wet.

He had me tied to his bed and blindfolded, he had me tied so  my wrists were tied to my ankles, he put the remote buzzing egg thing inside me, attached a nipple clamp to my clit and fucked my backside. I can barely describe the amazing orgasm that erupted from both of us after that one.

All of the time though, i was aware of that corset. i was aware of the effect it had on me - the way in which it made me hold my body, the way in which i looked and felt. Plus of course the effect it had on Him. Even more than ever it helped me become the play thing he wanted and needed. I felt like a sex object on legs and i loved it. If i have been on a journey (as described here on this blog), then i am now quite a way along the road to my destination.

Sitting or standing in the kitchen, in just corset and stockings, while he prepared me lunch or made tea or while i washed up felt erotic and was. Feeling him come up behind me, stroke and caress my bare backside and stroke my clit; what more could a woman want in life? 

Day Trip

For reasons which were mainly work related, i visited Sir for the day this week rather than stay over night. This meant a very early start, but i mitigated the effect of this by travelling by train rather than by car (ok i have said this already).

The clothing style was kind of business wear. I am a smart casual clothes wearer for work rather than power dress. But given the 7-8lb of weight loss, a shortish straight black and grey skirt was looking pretty good on me. This was accompanied by a white blouse (with black bra), black seamed stockings and black shoes. A new leopard print kind of cardigan set off the outfit, give the coolness of the morning.

I arrived in London slightly ahead of schedule and so got on an earlier train. I texted Sir to let him know and set him into a slight spin, whereby he had to mobilise himself a bit more quickly to meet me. But it did result in an extra half hour together, which we were both glad of.

An hour and a half train journey allows a woman to drink her coffee, apply her make up, read a book, observe the scenery and still arrive at her destination in time for a late breakfast. Of course if she is meeting her Master half an hour before that final destination she can expect some serious enjoyment on that last leg.

"Now wearing her 'fuck me' shoes she sat opposite the man dressed in the double breasted suit. After 2 or 3 stops the only other person in close vicinity was the woman sitting directly behind her knitting. As their eyes met, she opened her legs, revealing her stocking tops and the hint of a bare pussy. He reached across and stroked her leg, his hand reaching up past the stocking top. She gasped as his fingers found that she was already wet.

By the time the ticket inspector arrived to check their tickets the man in the suit had already brought her close to orgasm, her skirt hitched up around her waist, her legs spread wide for him. And once the lady and her knitting had left the train and they were alone in the carriage he not only brought her to orgasm but she had knelt down before him and sucked his cock.

All too soon, they arrived at their final destination. she straightened her clothes and, slightly wobbly on those high heels, she climbed down from the train. Next stop was His house, via the supermarket for a supply of croissants". An early start, plus such excitement before 9.30 am makes for a hungry Master and his slut!

Episode 2 -  The corset follows soon.

30 Days of Submission - Days 14 /15 The Train Journey

first of all lets get day 14 over with, then we can move on to the more interesting day......
 
Does religion have any bearing on your decision to submit? If not, are you familiar with religious based submission and do you view it as similar to other types of submission or dissimilar? 

I am no expert on religion, whether related to submission or not. It is not that I haven't been brought up to believe in and respect God, but more that I do not conform to religion without question. I have only knelt in church because I have been following a group of people doing so; indeed I am not someone who needs to attend church to believe in anything. I value the moral values that religion brings with it, but feel that there are too many people out there twisting religion to meet the beliefs they have. I felt that getting married in church was important to me at the time, but then it was a tradition to do so and I did many things around that time to please my parents. 

I don't believe that i can be a religious submissive for another reason - it is not my husband that I am submissive to and therefore I am no 'good wife'. Yep that absolves me from this one as far as I can see.

Has your submission evolved over time? If so, how has it evolved for you and if not (or if you are just starting out) how might you see or imagine it evolving in the future?

It has evolved alright. i am almost a different person to the one i was in April. From the beginning of this i have embraced new experiences, but i wouldn't have believed that i would do some of the things i willingly do now. Humiliation and pain have probably been the areas where the greatest development has taken place. Until recently i didn't even know that i would be able to stand being spanked with the lead attached to my collar, or that i would love to have my nipples clamped. If someone had told me in March that by September i would be travelling on a train wearing a tight skirt, seamed stockings and heels to meet a man who would within the hour have me tied to a bed while he spanked me, i would have declared them mad.  

But yesterday i not only did that, i exposed my bare pussy on that train, allowed my lovely Sir to stroke me and bring me to orgasm (with his permission of course) and briefly sucked his cock (shortly after the ticket inspector had checked our tickets). 

There is much much more to record here on my dear blog, but i need a day or two to get my thoughts in order. So bear with me!

Humiliation part two - the shopping trip

In part one of this adventure which can be found here i described how the slut in this story picked up a stranger from an airport coffee shop. The story continues below.

The guest house was the kind of place where people stay the night before their holiday particularly if they need to leave early in the morning for their flight and want to leave their car without paying airport car park charges. This couple were not the usual clientele, but were welcomed warmly none the less.

A couple of hours after check in, they emerged from the small shower cubicle together. Much had happened already. She had been collared and cuffed and made to kneel before him and take his big and very hard cock deep in her throat. She had welcomed his cock into her pussy, while she lay helpless, hands cuffed behind her back. Then he had taken her arse, something he knew she was particularly partial to. He was right! She had already lost count of how many times he had made her cum, but her pussy throbbed at the memory.

By the time they left the sanctity of their room to go in search of an indoor picnic at a local supermarket, she was wearing nipple clamps, her short dress and fuck me heels (higher than the ones she had picked him up in). Nothing else. She walked purposefully beside him. It was only a 10 minute walk away, and it is not unusual to see a woman wearing a short dress and heels on a hot summers evening. She was conscious the whole time though that she wore no underwear and that her nipples were clamped.

This man loves a bit of shopping it seams. He likes to wander back and forward while deciding what to eat and he loves a bargain. She pushed the trolley, found  a couple of reduced items which were greeted well and otherwise walked backwards and forwards either in front or behind him. Her nipples grew more and more painful but she found it a useful reminder of what had already happened, what would happen later and of course what she was.

At the back of the shop, she bent down to examine some wine (even though she was planning to stick to her no alcohol on a weeknight plan) and he took the opportunity to take a good look under her dress; to view her bare backside, her shaved pussy. To touch her.

Exciting the shop with their goodies they made their way though an alleyway towards the street where the guest house was situated. This was an excellent opportunity for Him to tell her to bend over and expose herself. Of course she did as she was told.

The walk back was painful. Her feet hurt; these shoes were not for walking. Plus she had insolently refused stockings for this trip as the ones he wanted her to wear would have looked ridiculous with the dress. Punishment is still to be given for this! In truth the stockings would have prevented the blister that formed on one of her feet. More painful still was that which emanated from her nipples. At the same time though she realised that this was a pain that also made her increasingly wet. A couple of times He tested this out by pinching her nipples and then touching her under her dress.

Once in the room he took full advantage of the feelings of humiliation, of arousal and of pain to complete his mission to make her submit to the needs of his once again hard and shiny cock. What is more she loved it.

Humiliation part one - the pick up

The journey was a hot one, a sunny day, the weather very warm. Her car, almost 8 years old was without air conditioning. It wasn't just the heat of the day though, the anticipation of what was to come added to the wetness which surrounded her lower body. The traffic was heavy, the road notorious for hold ups. The constant stopping and starting just added to the feelings of anticipation, after all, she was pretty eager to arrive.

The airport car park was busy, but finally she found a space on the 4th floor. Gathering her bag, and changing from flat sandals to heels she walked towards the lifts and the terminal building.

First stop was the ladies toilets. She needed to change from her sticky work clothes into something less heavy. Something short, something suitable for the occasion. Locking the cubicle door behind her she hung her bag from the hook on the wall and stripped off her skirt, top and bra (she was wearing no panties). She let all but the bra fall to the floor. Putting the bra inside the bag, she took out some stockings and a suspender belt bag and perched on the toilet. The stockings were smooth to the touch as she put them on. Running her hands up her legs, she shuddered slightly thinking about what was to come. Standing up in just stockings and shoes she set about attaching the suspender belt to the tops of the stockings. Lastly she took the little blue dress, and pulled it over her head, pulling it down to just below the tops of her stockings. She gathered up the work clothes and put them into her bag before emerging from the cubicle she headed towards the washbasins to apply her make up.

The airport had two terminals and she knew she was in the wrong one. She headed towards the monorail that connects them. She was excited, thrilled by what was about to happen, but at the same time nervous. Her dress was short, only just covering her bare newly shaved pussy, the air conditioning within the building made her feel cool for the first time in hours even though heat permeated from that area of her body.

The people around her were mainly casually dressed. Travel clothes, loose, cool. Some wore trousers, others shorts. No one appeared to be wearing heels, stockings. She wondered if anyone would look at her and notice. But actually no one appeared to. 

Within minutes she emerged from the train, along with a throng  of holiday makers with their heavy suitcases and strolled along the moving walkway towards her destiny. She reached a junction and rather than walk towards the check in desks as the people with suitcases did she took the route towards the arrivals hall.

This area was quieter than the monorail or the departure area and contained a number of coffee shops and other retail outlook. Ahead was a set of stairs, she climbed them slowly, but purposefully, mindful that a workman in a fluorescent jacket was standing within view and that there was a good chance he might be able to see up her short dress.

The coffee shop seating area was empty except for one man who was seated at the back by the wall. He glanced up over his reading glasses as she walked towards the counter and their eyes met. He was a smart looking traveller; wearing a light brown linen suit and a patterned silk shirt. This looked like an opportunity.

She bought a bottle of sparkling water from the counter, then taking the bottle and a glass walked to an adjacent seating area and sat down on the padded black seat. Having poured the water, she took a sip and looked across. He was looking at her. She looked down at her legs and pulled her dress up slightly so he could see her stocking tops and opened her legs a little, leaving him with no doubt what kind of a girl she was and what he could expect from her.

The minutes passed, she observed a group of airport police, complete with guns and a dog. Thinking she had better be less obvious. She swapped chairs thinking that this would give him a better view, without any chance of the police noticing but then found that the chairs in front of her prevented this. She also noticed that she was in full view of what seemed to be a staff room; she moved back. She didn't want to expose herself to them while hiding herself from her target.

She finished her drink, gathered her belongings and headed back down the stairs. Glancing behind she was pleased to see he was behind her. Back through the airport, a  short stop in the book shop, he was behind her all the way. Just before the monorail she stopped and he stopped right behind her. She asked him if he was following her and he smiled a lovely smile and agreed he was. He offered her a small cloth bag which he said she had left behind. Actually she hadn't but looking inside and seeing an array of adult toys she took the bag and agreed that indeed she had left it in the cafe.

Standing waiting for the train she felt a hand touching her leg, it travelled up her stocking top and briefly touched her bare bottom. She shivered with excitement enjoying the touch of his hand, before remembering that this was crowded place and that she didn't know this man and moving forward slightly. The train arrived and she stood facing the exit door. She could feel him standing close, his hands lifting her dress. Moisture erupted from her pussy as a cool breeze swept across her backside. She shook him off before edging back towards him for more. She wanted and needed this man and he seemed to want her,

She walked towards the lift to the car park and he followed. Inside the lift they were alone, they faced each other. Now he took her in his arms, kissed her and put his hands openly up her dress and felt her hot wet pussy. He asked her what she was at the airport for. She told him truthfully that she was there to find a man and he was the one. He told her he was a traveller and that he had been in a remote place where sexy women were far and few between. She observed his small rucksack and thought this unlikely.

They got into the front seats of the car, she in the driver seat, since this was her car and he again touched what would very soon become rightfully his. She was already close to the edge, could easily have cum there and then. But he took his hand away and instead undid the zip on his trousers. It was obvious what he wanted and she was happy to oblige.

In the middle of the 4th floor of the car park she leaned down and took his large, hard, smooth cock in her mouth.

One day

One day until i see Sir. We have chatted a lot this week about what we will do tomorrow. We are meeting in a public place as strangers (no details until after the event) then going to the place we have arranged to stay. Because we have had time, we have fine tuned the scene and our roles within it. i am pretty sure however that i will be one of the only people there wearing stockings on a baking hot day, mind you they will be flesh coloured so people probably won't know. Humiliation will be involved (you would expect no less from me) and i will be able to demonstrate that i am Sir's slut. This picture gives some idea of what my morning thoughts have been about today and what i am thinking about doing tomorrow (among other things).

i am pleased to say i have been pretty rigid when it comes to following my planned diet and fitness plan, and that has paid off. i have lost 4lb in weight. i have managed to meet all of the goals i set for the week and plan to increase the aerobic exercise to 4 times this week (though may end up calling events with Sir one of them)! I am so pleased i managed not to slip up on the alcohol front, especially as work was so busy. i have slipped into a routine whereby if i have a hectic day i reward myself with a glass of wine. Trouble is i follow it with another and then over half the bottle is gone (i know i need smaller glasses). i have had no wine at all this week and instead have had a couple of gin and tonics on Friday and Saturday. i feel better for it and intend carrying this on for the foreseeable future. I was very proud of myself when a work colleague brought cakes in for their birthday and i didn't even go and look at them. For next week i hope to keep this up, take my lunch in to work every day and to go out for a quick walk each lunchtime.

Today and tomorrow i will reaffirm my submission to myself by wearing no panties. i know Mrs Soft Bottom is exploring this side of herself and has for the first time gone to work commando. i have discovered that not only is having all my girly bits naked kind of invigorating i find it a reminder, all day long that i am doing this for Him and that i am His submissive. Soon i will be a slightly slimmer submissive who can wear my lovely corset for Him with pride.

Early morning dreaming

It has been nearly 4 weeks since Sir and i were last together. This has been the longest time between meetings, and it most definitely feels like it. I have had plenty to occupy me, crazily busy at work, birthdays (not just mine), family stuff, normal life.

We have chatted (and more) by phone, we have texted a bit and we have spent time together online (quite a bit this week). Virtual interaction is fine, but it isn't the same. You can't feel someone when you are online, touching yourself isn't the same as when they do it.

i have taken to thinking about Sir when lying in bed in the morning. The time when you wake, when you haven't yet moved. Or the time when i have brought my morning drink (hot water with lemon) back to bed and the news in droning on in the back ground. i think and i dream about what has happened before and what will happen next time.

i think of His cock. i think of how big it will be when it emerges from his trousers as i kneel before him. i think of how smooth it will be, how it will taste and how i will lick him and suck him. i think of how wet i will be as i suck, i think of how deep he will go.

i think of how He will restrain me, my hands cuffed. i think of my collar, which He will put on me as soon as we arrive at our hotel room.

i think of the nipple clamps. Of the way He sucks my nipples to prepare them. That feeling of pain followed by immense pleasure as He applies one clamp then the other. The pain and the pleasure when He pulls the little chain.

i think of the pleasure i get when He tells me: "you are wet slut" when He first touches my clitoris and how much more wet i become as He strokes me.

i think of Him taking me, using me, making me a whole person again. i think of the pleasure he gets from knowing that what we do together is reserved for him alone.

Sometimes, though not always, i make myself cum during these thoughts; often it doesn't take long. More usually though i just think and then get up, happy in the knowledge that however long i have to wait, one day sooner or later this will be real again.

Four days and counting!

Wet Run

One of the things that strikes me in my relationship with Sir is the extent to which he wants to know and to control what i am going to wear for him. We have now agreed the wardrobe for our next meeting and yesterday morning (while i worked from home!) we had a bit of a dry (or maybe wet, since i soon was) run.

Standing in front of my bedroom mirror in shortish dress that adequately covered my stockings and some very nice silver heels (i never realised when i bought those shoes how hard it would be to find clothes that would match them), i lifted my dress for him. He couldn't see this of course, he was over a hundred miles away and we don't do that webcam thing (not my cup of tea), rather we use the old fashioned phone. i described what could be seen if i bent over. We talked though meeting as if strangers in a coffee shop, me dropping something and bending over, my sitting opposite him and how much he might see if he looked under the table at my open legs. We talked about the possibility of walking around a supermarket together while my nipples were clamped. These discussions and writing about it now have an amazing effect on me. I reported that i was wet and sir as usual allowed me to touch myself and to orgasm for him.

Given a chance i would always prefer to be with Sir in person, giving myself to him. But when that can't happen online chats and definitely phone chats are a useful. They help remind me of who and what i am. They help me remember that i am his slut (he particularly likes me to tell him i am his slut, his whore as i cum) and they help set  me up for whatever else i am going to do.

I worked till just after lunch time (not that i actually ate lunch at lunch time) then i prepared a picnic for my brother, his girlfriend, hubby and i and we headed off to the races for an evening meeting. Wearing the knickers i had been wearing all day (different dress, no stockings) i was reminded frequently of what had happened during the morning and the discussions we had had. At the racecourse we sat on a blanket on the ground between races. With the start of the race though i got up, jumped about a bit to encourage my horse on (you have to embrace these opportunities for a bit of excitement). This whole process of sitting, standing and realising where your underwear is definitely serves as a reminder (Sir will love this bit),about what you were doing in them earlier.

We had a great time, i choose  my horses on the basis of their name, or if i have heard of the jockey and was unsuccessful this time. Hubby who applies some kind of secret knowledge to his decision making had a few good wins. Trouble is he tends to get a bit carried away and bets away his winnings given half a chance, on this occasion though i extracted a wad of cash which he can have back tomorrow. While there is no profit, the evening cost us the price of the admission, so that seems like a reasonable result.

There was a concert afterwards. Tom Jones still has a great voice and performed well. But he spent more time on music from his latest album rather than classic stuff, it was crowded, we couldn't get close enough to see properly and my back was aching (too much sitting then standing and jumping). Shortly before the end, feeling peckish (just the picnic all day) we headed off to a very nice Chinese restaurant and had a simple, reasonably light but very very nice meal before heading home.

My assessment of the day? Lovely in every way! 

Picture: Woman standing in front of a mirror, Christopher Wilhelm Eckersberg (1783-1853)

Mid life crisis?

i am wondering whether i should have my nipples pierced. Probably the very idea is part of a whole midlife crisis i am currently going through. What else can it be?

i have known for a long time that there is a very short fuse between my nipples and my clit. i am pretty sure i could cum from nipple play alone given the right kind of stimulation from the right person. The first time i put clothes pegs (pins in the US) on my nipples while on the phone to Sir was a telling moment.He says he could tell i had put them on from the tone of my voice. i immediately felt amazingly turned on, it didn't take much for Sir to make me cum.

Then the day in the woods, Sir introduced the nipple clamps which took me to a whole other level. I found that anything He did while they were on, just enhanced the experience. As Sir would say i am definitely a nipple slut.

We have talked a few times now about how things might be if i had my nipples pierced. To be honest i am now massively tempted. Turned on by the thought, and by the idea that is is something i would do for me and for Him. It is not something i could do without discussing with hubby though. He notices much more than he comments on and this is one thing i could NOT hide. Mind you i am approaching a rather massive birthday and it is time i had a midlife crisis.

Advice anyone?

Dear SIR

So today i head off to Barcelona for the weekend with hubby, my brother and his girlfriend, it feels like a good time to tell you that i have been writing this blog. You will have received the url in an email and i hope you read it. By doing so i hope that you can tell, if you didn't know already that meeting you has had a profound effect on me and on my life. i just want to say, Sir, that i couldn't be more glad that i stumbled across you on that particular chat site. That we played out that scene that night, that we chatted on the phone and that i was brave enough to turn up when we arranged to meet. In 3 short months you have helped me to find a completely different side to myself.

i started writing this blog soon after, as a place to write about myself and the person i hoped to become. i hope you will agree that with your help i am well on that journey. Who would have believed that i would become such a slut, and what is more your slut!

As you know i would give anything to be heading away for the weekend with you, but rest assured i will be thinking about you and about the wonderful things we do together, the amazing way you make me feel and will be looking forward to us being together for at least a whole night later this month.

With all of my love Sir,
Joolz xxx