Is your need to submit being met? If not, or if your situation changed, do you think that you could continue in your life and still be happy/content if you were never able to express your submission in the way that feels best to you again? What makes submission special to you?
Well finally i have reached day 30, who would imagine 30 days would be such a long time (I started this in August!) Considering the events of the past 10 days or so, it is fitting that i should be answering this question now. This is because this is just what i face. The change in my situation that could easily happen would probably lead me to be without the submission i crave. Just now, i cannot contemplate that happening.
If anyone had told me at the beginning of this year that i would want to kneel before a man, and put my body at his disposal, i would have told them they were mad. But it is kneeling before him or indeed bending over for him so he can spank me, feel me, fuck me, do with me what he wants, that has made me feel like a real person at last. Faced now with the possibility that i could be forced to give all this up is something i cannot bear.
i have thought lots over the months and especially this past week, about what makes submission special. for me i think it is about giving all of myself to another. It is about being prepared to place myself in His hands, at his will and mercy. Then it is the feelings that this submission creates inside of me. Being tied up, wearing his collar, being spanked, being told to keep my legs open, being humiliated; all of those things make me overwhelmed with submissive feelings.
i know that i can't do this with just anyone. i feel blessed to have met Sir and to have found my submission with Him. What i feel for him is very special and i think he knows that. i trust him and can't wait to submit to him again very soon.
Photo Source: Badlittlemiss