New focus

It is a couple of weeks since I decided to take a break and a little longer since I posted properly here. I am ready to return, but will be trying to focus on myself, my journey and things that are important to me.  In the few weeks before my break, I had struggled for topics. But also I felt constrained by the knowledge that this is a public place and therefore can be read by anyone. I was finding some aspects of communication with my Master difficult and was also struggling in the relationship His other slave  and I are trying to form.  This was not and still is not the place to do that. This is a place for me to express myself and my feelings, to consider my progress, my journey.

My blogging break when it came was as the result of an event. With my permission (perhaps some would say misguided), I gave permission for Master's slave  (who from now on I will refer to as k), to read my blog. At the same time I was allowed to read her journal.  Not surprisingly, we both became upset about some of the things we read. After all these are personal accounts and they involve relationships with the same man. What is more, she and I have not actually met yet.

I felt that I should at that point rethink this blog and whether I continued with it in a public place, made it private or indeed closed it all together. Master and I discussed this issue at some length and I came to the decision to take a break and at the same time, create a place for He and I to communicate with each other. This has proved successful, and has meant I can write things I have not been able to articulate into spoken words and allow those thoughts to be discussed between us.

k and I have also spent time trying to get to know each other, to try to avoid the misunderstandings which can occur when you are learning to trust each other as we are. I don't deny this is an ongoing journey for us both, but I think we are both moving to a different place in terms of our relationship with each other and the trust we need to have.

So, I return to my blog. I will continue to write and I continue to follow this journey.

Saturday morning fun

Master introduced two new toys shortly after we woke on Saturday morning. The first was some kind of oddly shaped gadget, apparently called (according to the website he obviously bought it from) an intimate part spreader. Also according to the website it stimulates the G spot. Well. It certainly stimulated the G spot. Plus seemed to cause this girl's clit to go into some kind of spasm. That is some toy!!! It looks weird, but wow!! 

This girl was ready for anything. Just as well, since He then introduced something else. Something this girl can only describe as a snake. Well, kind of very very long, double ended cock. Master made His girl fuck herself silly with that cock. Apparently it is suitable to fit in two different holes, or two different girls. Obviously the opportunities are endless. 

By the time this girl had had her cunt spread, her labia exposed, her clit blown on and then a large snake fucking her, she was a gibbering wreck deep in a subby space. Her reward for giving Master the pleasure of watching His girl used in this way was to be able to take Him in her mouth and reap the benefits of His orgasm.

This girl loves to give and receive pleasure and that was some pleasure. This girl was fit to burst with her own happiness.

Unfortunately later, events out of her control sent her into a bit of a tail spin. Events which took her all of Sunday morning to recover from. 

This girl has spoken before of the problems associated with the whole polyamorous lifestyle. Once again it was that whole thing which stopped this girl feeling quite as good as she had done. At times it is hard to understand quite what this girl or indeed Master does to deserve such highs and then such lows. But it is as it is. Things are back on an even keel again now, but this girl has to wonder for how long. This girl often wonders how she might get through this whole thing. Whether it is worth it. On Saturday night and into Sunday, she had serious doubts.

But it isn't often in life a girl gets the chance of the kind of happiness Master brings to her. The fun they have together, the way they are able to laugh through difficult situations. Life was never meant to be easy, and for sure it isn't. The life this girl and her Master are living is complex and down right complicated. But from where this girl sits right now it is worth it. 

Anyway where else will she find a man who has such a wonderful range of gadgets and isn't afraid to use them!